Oh hey, Alabama. And Georgia. And Kentucky. And...holy shit, so many more states than I was aware of. Just wanted to have a little chat with you about your recent attacks on women. And let's be very clear, here: that's exactly what these proposed "fetal heartbeat bills" are. I don't know if you've been paying attention, but women everywhere have had a few words to say to you on the matter. For example, the woman who was raped by her father regularly until she became pregnant at 12. Or the woman with the rare condition that means she has approximately 0% chance of carrying a fetus to term, and could possibly die trying to. Or the worryingly common story of teens who were raped, or horribly abused, or sold into a sex-trafficking ring, or taken advantage of, who found themselves pregnant. Or the millions of women around the world who simply don't feel like they should have to justify their desire to have control over their bodies, autonomy, and rights.
Look, I get it, I really do. Unlike a lot of vehemently pro-choice folks, I genuinely understand the pro-life position. The idea of willfully ending a life before it has even begun is unpleasant, at best. There's nothing about the act of aborting a fetus that I love, and I understand why people see it as an unquestionable wrong. But, here's the thing: it's none of my fucking business how others handle finding themselves pregnant. I cannot, and will not, ever value an unaware, unborn, potential person over a fully aware, fully alive, human being. I cannot, and will not, support the idea of forcing a 12 year old rape victim to bear a child. I cannot, and will not, support the idea of forcing anyone to bear a child.
Pregnancy is not a walk in the park. It is emotionally, mentally, physically, and financially draining at the best of times, and potentially fatal (on a number of levels) at the worst. It is not an event that one can simply breeze through, and all of your oh-so-helpful suggestions aren't simple either. Give them up for adoption? Sure, that's a great idea - just ask the hundreds of thousands of children in North America alone who are waiting to be adopted, and particularly the approximately 40% who never will be - who will instead spend their youth being bounced from foster home to foster home, many of which are terribly abusive. Use birth control? I fully support that idea! Unfortunately, many of you do not. An astonishingly high number of pro-life advocates are very much against affordable and easily accessible birth control, which, unsurprisingly, is most harmful to the already vulnerable: young people, minorities, and the poverty-stricken. Not to mention, birth control does exactly fuck-all to prevent pregnancies via rape and abuse. Accept having a baby as the consequence of sex? Seems reasonable on the face of it, I guess, except that, once again, women get raped. Women get abused. Women get forced into sex-trafficking. Girls, GIRLS, get "given" to older men as child brides in a number of fucked up religious cults. To force any of these people to relive their trauma every single fucking day for nine solid months seems nothing short of cruel to me.
And, come on, let's be real here. Many of you so-called pro-lifers aren't actually pro-life, you're pro-birth. You want to force girls and women to carry their pregnancies to term, but you have no intention of being there for them, or their babies, afterwards. You oppose subsidized daycare, you oppose welfare, you oppose socialized healthcare, you oppose same-sex couple adoption, you oppose subsidized housing, you oppose paid maternity and paternity leave, you oppose "big government" stepping in to the adoption and foster care systems. Worse yet, you also oppose the many proven ways of reducing unwanted pregnancies: you oppose free/cheap/easy to access birth control, you oppose realistic, comprehensive sexual education, you oppose assistance for the most vulnerable among us. What many of you seem to want is a world in which no one has sex until they are ready and willing to have a child. A world in which every pregnancy is intentional, viable, and seen through. A world in which rape victims see their baby as some sort of silver lining, a world in which aborting a fetus is much worse than any other potential. I truly do admire your optimism, but that is simply not the world we live in, nor is it the world that anyone has ever lived in.
If I may, I'd like to end our little chat here with a few questions. A little food for thought, if you will:
Are those questions sarcastic? A little. They're also entirely serious. If you are not part of the solution, you are part of the problem, and you need to step way the fuck back until you are willing to step up. You cannot be both pro-life and anti-compassion, anti-reason, anti-care. If you genuinely care about the unborn, you're going to have to start caring about the already born, and now.
Wherein I say
whatever I want.